looking for my real happiness

Sabado, Abril 18, 2015

Blocked me, Unblock me..

How do I block you in real LIFE? 

He blocked me on LINE last week and now I am writing about it..what the hell am i thinking? am I so affected about this or i just don't feel the hurt anymore. Shame on you! ahha bitter me,..i blocked him several times but i unblocked him again and again,..then finally he got his revenge and got rid of me. Good job! hahha ;) I feel  nothing, kinda empty, blank and just plain numb...We have blocked each other not just online but in real life..I haven't accepted the fact that he got the last laugh on this but what else can i do? feel hurt? bitter? or pathetic?..I've felt that way long time ago..but now that I am so over it,..I just wanna release the pinch of pain here in my heart,..a hole that once corrupted my whole being,..a scratch that would always feel itchy in cold season...a scar that would always reminds me of how mother f***er , a dream crusher, and stupid he was and maybe he still is.. hahah 

If there is something i feel unhappy about this is that..i let someone took over my life, my heart..I let someone stole the peace in me, the happiness i found on simple things...the life, the dreams i have for the future..I am trying to find the little pieces i left when  i lost him..the lost of a brother, a best friend,,a teacher and a lover..since then I haven't witnessed the sunrise,..i always look forward to sunset..dark is happiness..life is a piece of puzzle in a middle of dessert where i no longer exist..life ended there.so i sound pathetic eh?..yeah i think I am in a long journey of finding real happiness here..i know that only God can fill up the hole and complete the puzzle pieces of life i destroyed...i don't blame him nor anyone..i blame myself..only me.

I wanna close this blog by saying goodbye to a blissful relationship online and for all the heartaches..laughters, mixed up..i still believe in love..gotta eat more sweets to feel sweet again ahhah..

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